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This page is a piece of satire.

The perfect feminist is a creature that has never been witnessed in life yet, much like other mythical creatures, has a set of recognisable aspects culturally more or less agreed upon, and is frequently alluded to in speech.

Notably, the perfect feminist may well be the only mythological creature that is used as a tool of control and a template of expectations on its closest real-life counterpart. One would be hard-pressed to find an equestrian resenting their steed's shortcomings in being a unicorn, yet real-life feminists and women find themselves belittled, ignored, chastised, and criticized for not being a sparkly, sparkly feminism unicorn.

The Myth[]

The perfect feminist is female, because feminism is women's responsibility.

Regardless of her racial, class, ethnic, and cultural background, and regardless of the privilege and non-privilege in her life, the perfect feminist is never blind to any forms of sexism, even those she was raised to inherently accept for various reasons.


The perfect feminist never utters a sexist or cis-sexist word. She perfectly remembers everyone's pronouns. Even when cursing, she manages to choose the exact words that offend no-one, yet pack a punch.

In every situation, she always knows the ideal term that satisfies everyone when referring to a group of women who may or may not be elderly, teens, cis, non-cis, feminist, and prefer 'classy' or 'punk' styles. If none such term ideal for the group exists, she will come up with a new one on the spot. The new term will be perfectly clear in meaning to everyone, will not offend or alienate anyone, and will not make women and/or feminism bad.

Combat against sexism

Whatever happens, the perfect feminism never rests and never gives up. No matter how minor or devastating a foul, no matter how great the risk to her person or the call of her other duties, feminism will always come first. She will not sleep nor eat before sexism is over. She knows that ignoring even the slightest of slights, or giving up even the most futile of discussions with the most stubborn of sexists, would very certainly make her look like a hypocrite, and feminism bad.

She always has a comprehensive yet concise explanation at ready for those who nicely ask. She never gets frustrated or bored about repeating the basic tenets of feminism to people who don't feel like doing their own Feminism 101 research.

Personal life

The perfect feminist is heterosexual and happily married with children, because lesbians, immature sexually frustrated no-boyfriend-havers, and selfish no-children-havers make feminism look bad. Yet she perfectly understands the stigma that faces LGBTQIPA... people, and women who choose to be single and/or childfree.